Q&A: How can I better self esteem and be more social?
Posted: September 17th, 2011 | Author: Self esteem coach | Filed under: Self Esteem | Tags: Better, Esteem, More, Self, Social | 2 Comments »Question by yummy cupcake: How can I better self esteem and be more social?
I have low self esteem & have a hard time making friends. I’m starting a new school & I wanna make lots of new friends. I am friendly. I’ll say hi and say my name & we have a good start, but then I just stop talking to them. I want to be more confident, but not cocky. I want to be social. Any tips? Websites I can go to? Or books I can read?
Best answer:
Answer by Mia
http://www.glennharrold.com/hypnosis-cds-mp3-downloads-1.html#selfconfidence
Have a look round this site. There are some MP3 downloads you can buy or some books. I’ve used the recordings and they’re good.
Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!
this is what a very good friend of mine taught me. Say to yourself everyday out load that you are strong confident person (you have to be confident, like you actually believe it, when you say this). I know its sounds stupid and people does that a lot in TV but it really works. This process is called auto suggestion (if I remember correctly). You know how when people keeps telling something over and over you start to believe them? thats because what they say slowly enters our subconscious mind and we start to believe them.
I’m in the same situation as you, by the way (:
I am not a very confident person, but the the last time I moved schools, I found these tips very helpful:
- Don’t stand out from the croud too much. What I mean is, don’t wear personalized uniform, bright hair, loooooads of make-up. The kids will think you’re a bit strange, and might tease
- Ask people questions, eg. “Can you tell me where Geography class is?” “Yeah, I’ll take you there”.
This works really well as usually they might ask some questions on the way to class, so start talking about yourself. You have to be the ‘conversation starter’, as you don’t want things to get awkward. And choose someone that looks friendly to talk to.
- Don’t act like you’re really confident- because of course, you’re not. The other kids will know this if you start stuttering or blushing.
- In your first lesson, don’t just sit anywhere, ask your teacher where to sit. You might of already made a few friends, but you want more! As soon as you sit in your chair, say ‘hi’ to the kids on both sides of you. Ask for a pencil/rubber/ruler later on, even if you already have one.
- Don’t single out the popular people and think ‘I wanna be friends with them’, because popular’s can be really bitchy and nasty to new kids. Just go up to the ‘cool but friendly’ kids, the ‘average’ ones that still look social. When you start getting used to the school, then you can begin talking to popular people, and then you will start making friends through them, and so on.
- Don’t bitch about people when you only just make friends. Even if they’re doing the same thing. Just kind of half agree with them. If people found out you’d been saying stuff, you will end up getting rumours spread about you; resulting in less mates )’:
That’s just about everything I have. Good luck at your new school!! (: